Day with the Chickidees!

Send Help

What if you just saw a sign that said that….what if it wasn’t a sign, but a small message spray painted to the ground? Would you feel obligated to find the person that needs help and help them, or would you feel the need to help everyone in hopes of it one day getting back to that person. You don’t know what you’re supposed to do, as long as you ‘SEND HELP”.

This is the message I saw today. I was walking downtown with my friends and we came upon a church and in front of the church was a small thing spray painted two words on the ground and those two words said, send help. Creepy huh?

But shall I get back to that in a minute? Yes, yes I think I shall.

Today was a half-day at our lovely, glorious school (hate that stupid school), and today was seriously one of the better days where I look back on the day and realize that I have great friends and at least three other people I can plan on always having my back. When we first went downtown we went to Big O’s Café, which is a really cool pizza place that’s kinda sorta underground. The pizza was brilliant and since we all split the pill it was actually pretty cheap. The whole thing was 15.11 I think. I’m pretty sure everyone really enjoyed their lunch, they all even ate both pieces of pizza. Miranda “won” by the way, because she ate her second piece the quickest, she must be soooo proud. After that we went across the bridge by the Amway and saw how flooded the water was, and I was getting a little freaked out by it, not gonna lie. But after taking Katelyn into the Gerald R. Ford Museum so she could go be and getting watched vigorously by a security guard we found that we could get through to the walking bridge without getting swept away in heavy currents of the Grand River. I got some great picture of them all (Miranda, Katelyn, and Miranda), I even got one of all four of us. When we quickly walked back into the main part of the city because we were freezing we went into Barnes N Noble and then we went into Kendall College and looked at their art. I swear the artist there are so talented I was seriously impressed. After that we started a perilous journey to try and find the Calder so we could go on the tire swing that none of us had ever been on. After going through traffic, construction, and lack of signs with directions we found it (it really didn’t take that long), we had fun on the swing. (Not to self: Next time bring adult to push us.) Once again we were freezing so we went to MadCap afterwards. I love MadCap Hot chocolate with a deep deep passion. Yum there hot chocolate was brilliant as always and I once again got some cute pictures. Plus, the chick that was selling the hot chocolate was wearing exactly what you would expect from a coffeeshop worker, she was like adorable in a not weird way. Our last stop of the day was the Grand Rapids Public Library. I think it was nice there and I bought a yummy blueberry muffin.

Me and Katrina ended up spending the night at Miranda’s. So, that’s where I am now. But there has been more awesomeness involved in my day. Whilst at the library I was texting Ethan. You know that boy is really nice, he’s always being nice to me and even though I haven’t actually seen him since 5^th grade, I know that if I needed him he’d have my back. Which is always good to know, right? Yes. He quit working at the library café, by the way, it was just too much work over schoolwork. Then I told him that I had actually been looking for him at the library the other day. Well that was a mistake because I got the next 15 minutes of harassment, “Awwwww, you were looking for me! That’s so sweet!”. Aye Aye Aye, Ethan.  I miss that boy. Then I told him we were going to Miranda’s house and we were going to go in her hot tub and he was all “Hey can I come!? I love hot tubs then you can see my non-attractive body”, so then we had a REALLY awkward conversation about Ethan and “his body”. I don’t think me and Ethan needed to have that conversation, when a guy basically starts talking about his man-boobs that’s where the conversation ends; apparently I’ve never learned that lesson.  Then another one of the most amazing things happened: The Burlingame Dairy Dip opened! So me, Miranda, and Katrina were really stupid souls and braced the 30 degree weather to go get ice cream while walking Buddy and Beanie. It was so worth it!

 All in all I have had such and amazing night with my friends, and I’m so glad to have them. What would my life be if I didn’t have them. I wouldn’t even be me anymore without them.  Today has been one of those days that will probably go down as an imprinted memory. Something that is permanently embedded in my brain. And do you want to know something, I am so glad that I will hopefully remember today for a long while if not forever.

There is one last thing I need to say while wrinting this. There has been this pretty nice guy talking to Miranda on Facebook who apparently knows Alex so yea…Well he had a really bad day today. This girl who is basically his only friend dissed him and totally told him off. He is now feeling all sad and depressed and like he has nothing left to hold onto. Miranda, under the strange delision that I give good advice told him he should add me and I would tell him how to be happy. Great. I hope she knows I suck at giving advice. Apparently she doesn’t care. So I added him and started giving him “advice”. It was interesting and I feel really bad for him. The thing is though, I don’t know why he wanted to hang out with that girl in the first place she seemed like a real… well you know…. female dog.  I think I made him feel a little better. Seriously though, not to sound shallow but if this guy were a little cuter and went to our school I would probably like him, not gonna lie. But he doesn’t so don’t even start accusing me of things otherwise I will totally go off on you! This is where the “Send Help” thing plays in with this post. Maybe, I’m supposed to send help to people in every chance I get.

Maybe, this is all another one of those Karma things.

Karma usually finds a way of biting me in the butt.

What goes around comes back, around correct? I’ve been doing most everything go recently. Does that mean something good might happen to me for once?

Or should I not let that small bit of optimism in me that for some reason refuses to die get its hopes up of having a chance to be right for once. Because whenever I’m optimistic something bad happens.

Here comes a rollercoaster.

xoxox

~Baylee Jean

March 11th

Today is Friday.

Seems no different than Monday.

Well, I suppose there are some differences, on Monday at this time I was happy or at least in a good mood. I’m still grounded, and I will be all weekend. My parents fail. Haha, I can’t believe I just used the term fail in a post.

So, that means I have a boring weekend ahead of me.

Miranda told me that Scottie made it on American Idol. YAY SCOTTIE!!

So, I think I’m starting to get over things. Or as Ethan  (from Lee, whom used to be my friend in elementary school. I talk to him a lot of Facebook now.) says I’m just starting a term of silence, because no one listens to what I say anyways, so I mide as well not waste me breath. Right? Sigh.

I may seem dramatic, but I’m really not. What’s the point?

Well, I’m gonna go. Laptops about to die. Still grounded, not techinically aloud to write this, but I am anyway aren’t i? Yes, yes I am.

xoxox

~Baylee Jean

March 10

                I am grounded.

                So, no I am not technically aloud to be writing this. Once again I’m in math class; I have my laptop to “do homework”. My parents seem to think it’s affective to take away my stuff and ground me, I would think they would know me a little better than that. Apparently not. Well, me and my parents “made up”, “apologized, “have forgiven” each other, however you would like to say it. Grounding me is not affective obviously; I’m still finding a way around it. I got my lap top to “do school work” (although I really do have some to do, I had Miranda vote for Scottie on American Idol for me,  and they failed to take my iPod away so I still have music.

 I’m also using this lap top to keep an eye on my email. Although I may not be able to get on YouTube from school because the school blocks every little thing, I can still check my YouTube comments and messages through my email. Wanna know why this is a good thing? This is a good thing because the other day when I wrote a short thank you message to Robbie Rosen to thank him for responding, he wrote me back once again. So, I am trying to see if I can keep the conversation going. Yeah, I’m aware of the fact that this may not work. One of the reasons he probably responded before was because I wasn’t expecting him to, when now I obviously am. But since it seems I may be one of his biggest fans (I’ve always wanted to be a biggest fan, but I never actually have been. But now I think I might be J)  he might actually respond. I just started with a short message, I mean what if he responds. Wouldn’t it be awesome if I became internet friends with him. But there I go again, dreaming to be and getting ahead of myself. I just get a little bit happier when I get a message from him ya know. It seems like the whole world is falling down around me, and I need something a little bit crazy and unfamiliar. Well, here goes trying. What I wrote him to try to keep a conversation:“ J May I ask why you haven’t put your videos back up…..or is it a secret?? -__-“ Chances are he probably won’t respond again, not very likely but ya know I’m keeping an eager eye on my email.

So, as I’ve said, my whole world is falling down around me. Go ahead and look at me like some sort of drama queen, but it’s true, so I don’t really care. I’ll give you a list of everything that’s been going on, and describe in depth a little more what I think needs more explaining, how ‘bout?

Baylee’s Mess that people consider life: What’s wrong??

1.       I’ve gone crazy; nothing in this world makes sense. Pretty much every little thing gets to me these days, and I don’t care very much about a lot of things.

2.       Yesterday, I figured out that my mom probably will not have a job next year. (Fingers crossed that she does.) And she doesn’t even seem to care.

3.       I will more than likely NOT be going to New York this summer. Consider the reason #2.

4.       I will not be starting drivers training this summer, when I could have officially started Monday.

5.       I am grounded.

6.       My dress for the spring formal doesn’t fit, and I don’t even want to go to the stupid dance. What’s the point anyway??

7.       I’m not going to college and I am going to be a person living on the street. Reason 2 once again.

8.       I have to get open office for my word document instead of Microsoft 2010. L

9.       We are reading Romeo and Juliet, I actually love the book, but it makes me feel all single and stuff. Not that that’s terrible but geez. I wish I was Juliet, even though I know what happens in the end….

10.   Michigan sucks and I’m never going to get out of this stupid fricken state, now am I? No because it’s a cage with an electric fence and rusty bars on the cage. Filled with bird that can’t figure out what song to sing, or even worse, they are too afraid to sing there song. GRRR!!!!! I HATE PEOPLE!!

Need I go on with my list? I have many more reason. And I mean MANY more reasons. Life sucks. I don’t think I’m depressed or anything like that. I suppose I’m just realizing that life sucks, it’s not a fairytale, and love doesn’t actually exist. Think me melodramatic, I don’t care. It’s true. Very true.

What the heck. This fricken class, fricken hates me. Please, excuse my language. We just started a story problem, about Manhattan, New York. Does she have any clue how much I’ve been trying to keep my mind off of New York. It’s pretty much my biggest dream at the moment, to go to New York City.

I got a 69% on my math test for last unit. Whoopie! I am a failure. Why do I even keep trying. Someone please tell me why I keep trying. Is life even worth it?? Does any of it matter All they do is tell me I can’t. And Is tart to believe them, but I don’t want to believe them!!!!!!!!!

Ughh. Another day. Many, many more questions That keep burning into my mind and I don’t think I’ll ever find the answers for. Great! Even worse, you can’t hear the sarcasm in my typing. RAWRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just another day. Just another day. Can I make it by, just another day?? I guess only time will tell. Only time will tell. Here we go. I’m taking a breath. I’ll try to make it through the day.

Won’t be able to post this until next week. So this was written, March 10, 2011.

xoxox

~Baylee jean

March 7th

                I’m in math class right now.

                I’ve never actually written a post, while in school, so I guess that’s what I’ll do. I sound like a nerd now,L. Katrina is reading this over my shoulder, and she probably thinks I’m strange talking to a word document.

                The board currently says “Explain the difference between a ratio and a proportion.” I find it funny how I know that I will never have to know this in my life, but at least I know it. At least I know the difference right? Or do I know the difference?

                We’re saying good things right now. I should raise my hand and say that Robbie Rosen wrote to me. How concerned would they be? I know they’d all say “Who the heck is Robbie Rosen?” People at this school. I doubt any of them even watch the show…. Sigh.

                Katrina’s still reading this.

               

We finished checking our homework, I failed miserably. Well, not that bad actually but I didn’t do good. Luckily we go over a few problems.  Sad thing is, I knew this stuff. I suck.

But, as I’ve recently learned, yesterday: You have to love yourself and everyone else to be happy and truly beautiful.

We’ve gone through all the notes page now. I actually remember this stuff. The difference between “Similar and Congruent”. Homework should be easy tonight. Maybe I’ll even get it done in class. Yay!

I have English next period, and we’re gonna start reading Romeo and Juliet, I’m actually kind of excited to start reading it. Shakespeare actually does inspire me I think. Weird huh, I thought I was going to hate this unit. But, I’ve written a lot of poetry lately. I like to think it’s because of this unit in English class, but maybe I’m just emotional and I’m coming to a lot of realizations. It’s probably a mixture of both.

Well, I think I’m going to go now. I want to finish this before English, because I probably won’t get away with this in that class. Mrs. Kontras is awesome, but I think she has something against technology. So, yeah. I best get going (ßwow, I sound like an old person [wow, now I sound rude saying old people])

Good Bye everyone! Wish me luck with the rest of my day!

xoxox

~Baylee Jean

I think that maybe... you may have saved me.

I think you may have saved me.

I think I may have lost my mind.

I think that maybe-

There is hope in heart,

I should have remembered this from the start.

I think that maybe-

Heart really does triumph over beauty,

I can’t believe I almost let the opposite consume me.

I think that maybe-

Everyone does have an angel,

I’m so thankful mine appeared to me when he did.

I think that maybe-

Showing your heart is the truest form of beauty,

I believe I’ll be a better person, because you showed this to me.

I think I may have gone made without you,

You opened my eyes to something new,

that was so obvious but I was too blind to notice.

I think you may have saved me,

From my oblivious self.

And for this-

I’d like to thank you!

(This may sound wierd, but I don't mean it in a creepy way, this poem is dedicated to Robbie Rosen. I don't mean this in the starstruck love way. I mean this in the, 'you opened my eyes to all this obvious stuff that I was at risk of forgetting' so thank you!)

xoxox
~Baylee Jean

Robbie Rosen has made my day!! :D

Just as the title says, Robbie Rosen made my day (Maybe even my month.)!

            On Thursday night I spent the time from 8-10 in agony, watching American Idol waiting to see if Robbie Rosen would make the top ten (13 actually). After how much I voted for him, I was sure he would make it. Unfortunately, after so much build-up Robbie did not make the top 10 (13). Once I found out the news, I jumped off my bed, turned off the TV, and then went to bed without a word; tears building up in my eyes. After my mom came in, said she was sorry he didn’t make it, and told me goodnight, I started to cry. I cried for two reasons: 1.) I wouldn’t get to see Robbie Rosen singing on American Idol every week. 2.) I kept imagining how bad Robbie Rosen must have felt, America didn’t pick him, I would be devastated. I felt sad about it on and off all of Friday, yeah I know a little emotional. I had a hard week, if you hadn’t noticed from earlier post.

On Friday night, I ventured over to Robbie Rosen’s YouTube channel to write him a comment I was sure he wouldn’t read. I had a lot to say, and I wanted to put it out there, even though I didn’t think anyone would really read it. I actually wrote him two; one I posted on his profile, the other one I sent to him in a message.

Comment:

Dear Robbie,

I know you’ve heard this a lot, so I’ll try to keep this short. I voted for you as much as possible, on phone and online at the same time.  I cried when the judges didn’t pick you (yeah talk about emotional).  Robbie, I just want you to know that you have a beautiful voice and you can still get very far in the music business. I hope you get a record deal somewhere along the way, I know you can; when you do, I’ll be the first one to buy your CD and the girl in the first row. I know, my comment doesn’t really matter, you have a million more. You probably won’t even read it, but I thought I’d tell you anyway. Keep singing, please. Also, can you PLEASE put you videos back on public so I can watch them?

Sincerely,

The 14 yr old MI girl that know America voted wrong,

~Baylee Jean

I doubt you're reading this....

Dear Robbie,
I know you've heard this a lot, so I'll try to keep this short, I posted it in your comments also. I voted for you as much as possible, on phone and online at the same time. I cried when the judges didn't pick you (yeah talk about emotional). I could listen to you sing all day, your voice has such control, and you can hit notes in every range. Don't ever give up! (I don;t think you would) I will be seriously disappointed if I never hear Robbie Rosen sing again, becasue you have one of the most beautiful voices ever. Robbie, I just want you to know that you have a beautiful voice and you can still get very far in the music business. I hope you get a record deal somewhere along the way, I know you can; when you do, I'll be the first one to buy your CD and the girl in the first row. I know, my comment doesn't really matter, you have a million more. You probably won't even read it, but I thought I'd tell you anyway. Keep singing, please. Also, can you PLEASE put you videos back on public so I can watch them?
Sincerely,
The 14 yr old MI girl that know America voted wrong,
~Baylee Jean

P.S. Remember: You have fans all around the country now! XD
P.S.S You're cute too! ;)
Haha

Inspirational Song Quote that I hope makes sense with what I'm saying:
"Hey Jude, don't make it sad. Take a sad song, and make it better."

A few typos and stuff, but I didn’t really care at the time.

Today (the Sunday after), I was at Miranda’s house and I went on my Gmail, it said I had a new comment on my profile, but it didn’t say who it was from. When I logged onto my YouTube,  I went onto my YouTube channel and the first comment I see is from RobbieRosenSings! HE RESPONDED TO ME! ME!!!!! And I’ve checked, he hasn’t responded to many others. I’m not sure if he read the comment or the message, maybe both.

Here’s what he wrote:

robbierosensings (20 hours ago) Marked as spam hey baylee!!! i read what you wrote and wowowow how beautiful!!! thank you SOOO much for what ya said, that really means a lot to me!! this is definitely just the beginning for me so don't worry about that, i'm gonna keep going!! =] the amount of exposure i got from the show was tremendous too so that should definitely help me in my career...anyways, back to what you said, i'm just so happy you wrote what you did, and i'm so thankful i have a fan like you!!! thanks again :)

EEEKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!! Isn’t he so sweet!!!  My favorite part is the “wowowow”! He responded to me, can you believe it?!?  And he’s thankful to have a fan  like me! We’ll this has completely made my entire day!

Well, I think I’m going to go now, but Robbie Rosen, even after being eliminated continues to make me happy and be brilliant! I really will be waiting to see more from him, I think I might actually be his biggest fan! And I guess he’s not too torn up about being eliminated, he’s staying positive!

Extremely happy!

xoxox

~Baylee Jean

Poem i wrote (based on true events)

“Why am I so confused?” she asked me.

“I, myself have been wondering the same thing,” I tell her.

She acts concerned, but I can see

Her sudden apathy.

But I know I’ll break

If I keep all this bottled inside of me.

I’ll bore her with my tales

Of my pitiful life

And her responses come shorter

And I know that she doesn’t know how to fix

My eternal strife

Maybe she doesn’t care

But I call her friend

So my terrible tales

Of what some may call life

With her I share

“Are you happy?” she ask me.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I respond,

Tired of trying to explain,

When no one listens anyway

“Reasons” she tells me,

Like she knows

Yeah,

Reasons I think

I’m a lone

I constantly disappointing myself

I’d rather live in my imagination than reality

No one believes in me.

I’m never good enough

A list of reasons

But I could never tell her that

She would think I want pity

I don’t want pity

I want answers

I move on with the conversation

Like everything is almost fine.

But secretly-

I’m screaming-

“Help!”

 Inside.